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Oh fuck. Looks like I'm doing the bailing thing again.
The thing where I'm supposed to go somewhere or do something but instead I don't and I cower and hide and shut down and hate myself for doing so.
Not good. Not good at all
I'm so sorry. I just don't know how to fight it.
Stupid, stupid, stupid Darna. *bangs her head agains the desk*
I suppose I need some sort of help, but who could help me?
Not those psych guys for sure. They're supposed to be professionals and I have to explain stuff to them. I mean, I could of course be wrong, but I don't think being hypersensitive and empathic has anything to do with being delusional.
No, I do NOT hear voices in my head or in the radiowaves or anything like that. I am NOT afraid of absorbing into someone else or absorbing someone else into myself. I do NOT over-identify with fictional characters (I mean, I may identify with them, but I don't walk around believing seriously I'm a 17th century pirate or something) and can tell fiction from reality just fine.
While other people's emotions taking over me may confuse me from time to time, I've never lost the grasp of my own identity (well, not any more than any normal teenager, as everyone goes through that "Who am I?" phase I suppose).
Ah well. Maybe they just don't have to deal so often with people like me who are just so bloody sensitive to everything (on increasing level, no less...) that it's making them neurotic, socially challenged nerve-racks who have to push people away and keep them at arm's length to shield both themselves from others and others from themselves. *bitter chuckle*
Maybe I just have to accept that I'm doomed because as far as I know, there's nothing that can be done about this. They could of course sedate me or lock me up in some institute, but would it help on long run? Hell no.
Some sort of meditation? If only I had the patience to try. *sigh*
The thing where I'm supposed to go somewhere or do something but instead I don't and I cower and hide and shut down and hate myself for doing so.
Not good. Not good at all
I'm so sorry. I just don't know how to fight it.
Stupid, stupid, stupid Darna. *bangs her head agains the desk*
I suppose I need some sort of help, but who could help me?
Not those psych guys for sure. They're supposed to be professionals and I have to explain stuff to them. I mean, I could of course be wrong, but I don't think being hypersensitive and empathic has anything to do with being delusional.
No, I do NOT hear voices in my head or in the radiowaves or anything like that. I am NOT afraid of absorbing into someone else or absorbing someone else into myself. I do NOT over-identify with fictional characters (I mean, I may identify with them, but I don't walk around believing seriously I'm a 17th century pirate or something) and can tell fiction from reality just fine.
While other people's emotions taking over me may confuse me from time to time, I've never lost the grasp of my own identity (well, not any more than any normal teenager, as everyone goes through that "Who am I?" phase I suppose).
Ah well. Maybe they just don't have to deal so often with people like me who are just so bloody sensitive to everything (on increasing level, no less...) that it's making them neurotic, socially challenged nerve-racks who have to push people away and keep them at arm's length to shield both themselves from others and others from themselves. *bitter chuckle*
Maybe I just have to accept that I'm doomed because as far as I know, there's nothing that can be done about this. They could of course sedate me or lock me up in some institute, but would it help on long run? Hell no.
Some sort of meditation? If only I had the patience to try. *sigh*
