Went to see Once yesterday with my mom (yeah, it only came two bloody years late to Finland *rolls eyes*).
Quite a lovely little film, reminded me a lot of my beloved Before Sunrise, with a guy and a girl from two different cultures meeting randomly in a European capital and deciding to spend some time together and maybe falling in love in process.
Only instead of ten hours these two had a week and they spent it making music together in Dublin instead of just talking about anything and everything while wandering around Vienna like Jesse and Céline did.
Now I have Falling Slowly (which quite rightfully won an Oscar, even though it may not at first seem like a song that would) stuck in my head and am "homesick" for Dublin more than ever. It was fun seeing all those familiar places: the HMV on the Grafton Street where the nice salesgirl basically insisted we made use of the discount, St. Stephen's Green, the O'Connell Bridge... *sigh*
It will be probably a while before I can return, as our original plan to spend a weekend in Dublin in September with mom won't most likely work because it's very possible that me and Ella will be moving in together in September (which, on the other hand: yay!). Surprisingly enough she (my mom) did suggest that we'd go to Dublin in next April circa 24th so I can go lay flowers in front of the GPO. *smiles* I'd also like to visit the Arbour Hill and the Glasnevin Cemetery if we only have time.
I've also been thinking about maybe celebrating my 22nd birthday in Ireland. Halloween in Dublin could be an interesting experience. :D But we'll see...
Hmm. Okay. Forget Falling Slowly and instead go and have a listen of this.
That film was full of gorgeous music, but If You Want Me really stands out. <3
By the way, I had the strangest dream the other night. I somehow crossed paths again with my old junior high school crush and he ended up confessing he has loved me since those days almost ten years ago, and then we were kissing, which was nice, but even in that dream I was constantly thinking: "Okay, WTH is going on?". *chuckle*
In another part of the dream there also was this huge gorgeous butterfly in all the glimmering colors of the rainbow, which I think was supposed to symbolize something. Any thoughts on that? What are butterflies usually supposed to symbolize in dreams?
Quite a lovely little film, reminded me a lot of my beloved Before Sunrise, with a guy and a girl from two different cultures meeting randomly in a European capital and deciding to spend some time together and maybe falling in love in process.
Only instead of ten hours these two had a week and they spent it making music together in Dublin instead of just talking about anything and everything while wandering around Vienna like Jesse and Céline did.
Now I have Falling Slowly (which quite rightfully won an Oscar, even though it may not at first seem like a song that would) stuck in my head and am "homesick" for Dublin more than ever. It was fun seeing all those familiar places: the HMV on the Grafton Street where the nice salesgirl basically insisted we made use of the discount, St. Stephen's Green, the O'Connell Bridge... *sigh*
It will be probably a while before I can return, as our original plan to spend a weekend in Dublin in September with mom won't most likely work because it's very possible that me and Ella will be moving in together in September (which, on the other hand: yay!). Surprisingly enough she (my mom) did suggest that we'd go to Dublin in next April circa 24th so I can go lay flowers in front of the GPO. *smiles* I'd also like to visit the Arbour Hill and the Glasnevin Cemetery if we only have time.
I've also been thinking about maybe celebrating my 22nd birthday in Ireland. Halloween in Dublin could be an interesting experience. :D But we'll see...
Hmm. Okay. Forget Falling Slowly and instead go and have a listen of this.
That film was full of gorgeous music, but If You Want Me really stands out. <3
By the way, I had the strangest dream the other night. I somehow crossed paths again with my old junior high school crush and he ended up confessing he has loved me since those days almost ten years ago, and then we were kissing, which was nice, but even in that dream I was constantly thinking: "Okay, WTH is going on?". *chuckle*
In another part of the dream there also was this huge gorgeous butterfly in all the glimmering colors of the rainbow, which I think was supposed to symbolize something. Any thoughts on that? What are butterflies usually supposed to symbolize in dreams?
(no subject)
30 December 2007 10:23Mmh, during the past week or so I've had so much going on in my head I've been dying to write down but haven't had time, strength or possibility to do so due to a) spending the Christmas at my mom's place b) falling once again mysteriously ill (another of those strange and unexplainable muscle cramp spells plus a high fever, this time I even had to spend some time at the medical center under surveillance, oh joy) c) probably as an after-effect of said illness, being generally lethargic and tired.
But anyway. Rant time.
I bought the second book of Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series, New Moon, for myself as a Christmas present and realized something a bit surprising while reading it. In case there's someone who wants to read it and hasn't yet reading this, I'll put the spoilery parts under a cut.
( Beauty and the Beasts )
But yes, what I actually realized was that I once again rebelled against the canon "main couple" and rooted for the underdog. When I started to think about it, I do that quite a lot.
It's actually very rarely that I support "the good ship" if there is an interesting alternative available.
Let's see...
Arwen and Aragorn? Boring! Éowyn and Faramir all the way.
One of the biggest faults of the otherwise brilliant movie trilogy was what they did to Faramir, including his beautiful romance with Éowyn which actually is the only visible romance there is in the book. They walk together in the garden and on the city walls, they talk, they confess to each other their dreams and fears, they even banter. What's not to love?
Jean and Scott? Well, pretty much anything involving good ol' Slim is enough to bore anyone into tears.
Plus, while I know perfectly well that by a long run the whole idea of Jean and Logan is completely absurd, his undying, unrequited love and devotion for her is something truly amazing. But well, my main ship in that fandom is Gambit/Rogue anyway. They're way too fucked-up and complicated to probably ever become boring. :D
Jack and Kate? Jate is fate, my ass. They don't even bore me, they make me cringe.
Jack makes me wish he would die a painful death every time he's on screen, and every time Kate is with him, I want to slap her. She completely forgets she's a competent badass bitch and becomes a sniveling, simpering wuss who practically grovels for his acceptance, and he doesn't help by patronizing her. What a great romance. *rolls eyes* And I don't say this just because I'm a so-called Skater, I'd be completely pleased if she ran off with Sayid or something, as long as it isn't Jack. But I hope beyond hope that she would stick with Sawyer. *sigh*
Will and Elizabeth... well, don't even get me started on them! Because that would never end.
In Harry Potter I could never care less about the relationships between the protagonists, it was always the side characters I found more intriguing anyway.
Actually, I think that out of all my 'ships, only Buffy and Angel have been a "good ship", and them I started shipping when I was 14 or something. Drizzt and Catti-brie are generally accepted as the main couple now (after years of indecisive on-offness, thoug), but they weren't that originally and Wulfgar was still around for a long time even after their relationship started to develop.
Shipping is pretty illogical business, and not all of my ships follow the same pattern, but most of them do. I've come to the conclusion that I usually root for relationships that are based on good companionship and/or some kind of deeper connection, mutual understanding. Which probably isn't all that surprising, considering that's the kind of love I would like to find one day. *chuckle*
Mmh. I had much more to write/rant about, but my brain's apparently not functioning properly again. Could be my screwed-up sleeping pattern, I woke up at midnight so I'm starting to feel a bit dizzy. I can't go to sleep yet, though, otherwise I'll never regain a normal pattern.
New Year's Eve tomorrow. I have no idea where I'll be. Possibly in Laitila, possibly in here. With Tommi I'm apparently at odds again at least. He saw himself justified to get mad at me because I couldn't answer the phone when I was at the med center. Pshh, whatever. He's not my pack leader.
I somehow don't want this year to end. Or actually, I don't want year 2008 to start.
I don't know why, I just have a strange, uncomfortable feeling about it.
But anyway. Rant time.
I bought the second book of Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series, New Moon, for myself as a Christmas present and realized something a bit surprising while reading it. In case there's someone who wants to read it and hasn't yet reading this, I'll put the spoilery parts under a cut.
( Beauty and the Beasts )
But yes, what I actually realized was that I once again rebelled against the canon "main couple" and rooted for the underdog. When I started to think about it, I do that quite a lot.
It's actually very rarely that I support "the good ship" if there is an interesting alternative available.
Let's see...
Arwen and Aragorn? Boring! Éowyn and Faramir all the way.
One of the biggest faults of the otherwise brilliant movie trilogy was what they did to Faramir, including his beautiful romance with Éowyn which actually is the only visible romance there is in the book. They walk together in the garden and on the city walls, they talk, they confess to each other their dreams and fears, they even banter. What's not to love?
Jean and Scott? Well, pretty much anything involving good ol' Slim is enough to bore anyone into tears.
Plus, while I know perfectly well that by a long run the whole idea of Jean and Logan is completely absurd, his undying, unrequited love and devotion for her is something truly amazing. But well, my main ship in that fandom is Gambit/Rogue anyway. They're way too fucked-up and complicated to probably ever become boring. :D
Jack and Kate? Jate is fate, my ass. They don't even bore me, they make me cringe.
Jack makes me wish he would die a painful death every time he's on screen, and every time Kate is with him, I want to slap her. She completely forgets she's a competent badass bitch and becomes a sniveling, simpering wuss who practically grovels for his acceptance, and he doesn't help by patronizing her. What a great romance. *rolls eyes* And I don't say this just because I'm a so-called Skater, I'd be completely pleased if she ran off with Sayid or something, as long as it isn't Jack. But I hope beyond hope that she would stick with Sawyer. *sigh*
Will and Elizabeth... well, don't even get me started on them! Because that would never end.
In Harry Potter I could never care less about the relationships between the protagonists, it was always the side characters I found more intriguing anyway.
Actually, I think that out of all my 'ships, only Buffy and Angel have been a "good ship", and them I started shipping when I was 14 or something. Drizzt and Catti-brie are generally accepted as the main couple now (after years of indecisive on-offness, thoug), but they weren't that originally and Wulfgar was still around for a long time even after their relationship started to develop.
Shipping is pretty illogical business, and not all of my ships follow the same pattern, but most of them do. I've come to the conclusion that I usually root for relationships that are based on good companionship and/or some kind of deeper connection, mutual understanding. Which probably isn't all that surprising, considering that's the kind of love I would like to find one day. *chuckle*
Mmh. I had much more to write/rant about, but my brain's apparently not functioning properly again. Could be my screwed-up sleeping pattern, I woke up at midnight so I'm starting to feel a bit dizzy. I can't go to sleep yet, though, otherwise I'll never regain a normal pattern.
New Year's Eve tomorrow. I have no idea where I'll be. Possibly in Laitila, possibly in here. With Tommi I'm apparently at odds again at least. He saw himself justified to get mad at me because I couldn't answer the phone when I was at the med center. Pshh, whatever. He's not my pack leader.
I somehow don't want this year to end. Or actually, I don't want year 2008 to start.
I don't know why, I just have a strange, uncomfortable feeling about it.
Pride & Prejudice
16 October 2007 02:01So... If I have learned something important or met someone important in each year's September ever since 2003, I guess this year's lesson is: "Your actions have consequences."
I've also come to realize, although more recently than in September, what an arrogant, presumptuous fool I have occasionally been (and what consequences it has had).
It's oddly fitting that I learned this now, because during the past two weeks I've been having a some kind of Jane Austen phase (I've watched the new Pride & Prejudice movie at least thrice and listened to the soundtrack on repeat). So if I've identified with Lizzy before, I understand her dismay after realizing how wrong she had been even better now. And Darcy's too, especially after reading Maya Slater's Mr. Darcy's Diary, fanfiction in form of literature as it may be.
I'm pretty ashamed of myself, especially for the trouble and chagrin I have unintentionally caused to others, but I guess there's no use dwelling on it. Past is past. *sigh*
Ahh, anyways... I suppose something good came out of that little misadventure in Helsinki a couple of weeks ago as well, because it now looks like me and Ella are going to Dublin in April. For real. I've now decided to go there in the spring even if we don't get tickets to that NW gig. It would be cool, of course, as they're still my favourite band and all, but... yeah.
So, in conclusion: Whoo yeah, I'm going home(?)! *big wide grin*
I've also come to realize, although more recently than in September, what an arrogant, presumptuous fool I have occasionally been (and what consequences it has had).
It's oddly fitting that I learned this now, because during the past two weeks I've been having a some kind of Jane Austen phase (I've watched the new Pride & Prejudice movie at least thrice and listened to the soundtrack on repeat). So if I've identified with Lizzy before, I understand her dismay after realizing how wrong she had been even better now. And Darcy's too, especially after reading Maya Slater's Mr. Darcy's Diary, fanfiction in form of literature as it may be.
I'm pretty ashamed of myself, especially for the trouble and chagrin I have unintentionally caused to others, but I guess there's no use dwelling on it. Past is past. *sigh*
Ahh, anyways... I suppose something good came out of that little misadventure in Helsinki a couple of weeks ago as well, because it now looks like me and Ella are going to Dublin in April. For real. I've now decided to go there in the spring even if we don't get tickets to that NW gig. It would be cool, of course, as they're still my favourite band and all, but... yeah.
So, in conclusion: Whoo yeah, I'm going home(?)! *big wide grin*
I've really started to wonder why songs about the 1916 Easter Rising in Ireland are always making me cry. Sure, The Foggy Dew and Down By the Glenside are beautiful and touching tunes, but still...
I do not generally support bloodshed, even if it was in the name of liberty.
Nor am I a Republican or a nationalist of any kind. If I hear songs or tales about the Finnish War of Independence (or alternatively, Civil War or The Great Mindless Bloodbath), I'm mostly thinking something like "Bloody stupid idiots" or "I'm supposed to care?". So I couldn't give a damn about Mannerheim & co., but if I hear a song about Pádraig Pearse and his Fenians, I'm bawling like a baby? Odd.
I should probably watch that The Wind That Shakes the Barley someday to get a better picture about that whole era and see if my opinion about the Irish War of Independence and the Civil War is really any different than my opinion of the Finnish ones. Somehow I doubt it. Bloody Sunday's (both of them, really) nothing to be proud of, after all. IRA be damned.
But... If you'll allow me to venture into the realm of mystical mumbo-jumbo again for a moment...
If I think about that dream-vision-thingy I've had for I don't even know how long, the one with the young woman standing on a moor by the stormy sea (in moonlight, no less), clearly mourning but also determined, I suppose the imagery fits the beginning of the 1900s... (But then again I've always thought it's somewhere in Western Ireland, maybe in Connacht or somewhere near Clare in Munster, judging by the steep cliffs.)
Ah well, who knows... Maybe some past incarnation of me did live in Ireland circa 1916, or maybe earlier. Maybe not at all and I'm just imagining things. But it would kinda explain a lot.
Or maybe it's just the magic of the Irish music, as those people can sing about anything and make it the most heart-wrenching song ever. But strangely enough it's still this verse of The Foggy Dew that usually makes me cry the most:
"Twas Britannia bade our Wild Geese go, that "small nations might be free";
Their lonely graves are by Suvla's waves or the fringe of the great North Sea.
Oh, had they died by Pearse's side or fought with Cathal Brugha
Their graves we'd keep where the Fenians sleep, 'neath the shroud of the foggy dew."
And these as well:
"Oh the bravest fell, and the Requiem bell rang mournfully and clear
For those who died that Eastertide in the spring time of the year.
And the world did gaze, in deep amaze, at those fearless men, but few,
Who bore the fight that freedom's light might shine through the foggy dew.
As back through the glen I rode again and my heart with grief was sore
For I parted then with valiant men whom I never shall see more.
But to and fro in my dreams I go and I kneel and pray for you,
For slavery fled, O glorious dead, when you fell in the foggy dew."
As I said: odd. *shakes head and wipes tears*
I do not generally support bloodshed, even if it was in the name of liberty.
Nor am I a Republican or a nationalist of any kind. If I hear songs or tales about the Finnish War of Independence (or alternatively, Civil War or The Great Mindless Bloodbath), I'm mostly thinking something like "Bloody stupid idiots" or "I'm supposed to care?". So I couldn't give a damn about Mannerheim & co., but if I hear a song about Pádraig Pearse and his Fenians, I'm bawling like a baby? Odd.
I should probably watch that The Wind That Shakes the Barley someday to get a better picture about that whole era and see if my opinion about the Irish War of Independence and the Civil War is really any different than my opinion of the Finnish ones. Somehow I doubt it. Bloody Sunday's (both of them, really) nothing to be proud of, after all. IRA be damned.
But... If you'll allow me to venture into the realm of mystical mumbo-jumbo again for a moment...
If I think about that dream-vision-thingy I've had for I don't even know how long, the one with the young woman standing on a moor by the stormy sea (in moonlight, no less), clearly mourning but also determined, I suppose the imagery fits the beginning of the 1900s... (But then again I've always thought it's somewhere in Western Ireland, maybe in Connacht or somewhere near Clare in Munster, judging by the steep cliffs.)
Ah well, who knows... Maybe some past incarnation of me did live in Ireland circa 1916, or maybe earlier. Maybe not at all and I'm just imagining things. But it would kinda explain a lot.
Or maybe it's just the magic of the Irish music, as those people can sing about anything and make it the most heart-wrenching song ever. But strangely enough it's still this verse of The Foggy Dew that usually makes me cry the most:
"Twas Britannia bade our Wild Geese go, that "small nations might be free";
Their lonely graves are by Suvla's waves or the fringe of the great North Sea.
Oh, had they died by Pearse's side or fought with Cathal Brugha
Their graves we'd keep where the Fenians sleep, 'neath the shroud of the foggy dew."
And these as well:
"Oh the bravest fell, and the Requiem bell rang mournfully and clear
For those who died that Eastertide in the spring time of the year.
And the world did gaze, in deep amaze, at those fearless men, but few,
Who bore the fight that freedom's light might shine through the foggy dew.
As back through the glen I rode again and my heart with grief was sore
For I parted then with valiant men whom I never shall see more.
But to and fro in my dreams I go and I kneel and pray for you,
For slavery fled, O glorious dead, when you fell in the foggy dew."
As I said: odd. *shakes head and wipes tears*
Hmm. I should probably start being less open about my eccentricisms on public message boards, I've already apparently managed to make certain people think I'm some obsessed psycho and a possible threat. *dry chuckle*
Oh well, shit happens. It does bother me but I guess there's nothing I can do about it.
Ah well, anyways...
I had a nice day. We went to see the fifth Harry Potter movie and I have to say it became my favourite one after The Prisoner of Azkaban, it had a very similar feel to it.
It followed the book very loyally, had some great scenes, great continuity from the previous films (same sets, props and even clothes and flashbacks from the previous films) and über-cute Tonks and Luna.
But there wasn't enough of the Order! The Order of the Phoenix is probably the coolest thing in the whole Potter universe, they deserve more screen time. Especially Remus, who was on the screen like two minutes if even that much (but ha! I always knew young Remus had long hair :]) and wasn't even in the Advance Guard which is weird because the whole point was that he was the only one there whom Harry knew for sure he could trust. And the "Don't call me Nymphadora!" line was supposed to be bantery and the first hint about what happens in the next book. (Yeah, I ship Remus/Tonks, sue me :p)
Also the finale was a bit anticlimatic somehow and Voldy looked too human, must have been the eyes (and it certainly didn't help to see him in a suit or dressed like Harry).
Bellatrix was okay, though half of the time I couldn't help thinking that Helena Bonham Carter was just being herself. ;p But Rodolphus and Rabastan looked great!
Oh, and the "new" Dumbledore still doesn't convince me. He's too shabby and impatient and where the hell are his half-moon glasses? RIP Richard Harris. *sigh*
After the movie we went to eat some Chinese (which I decided is not really for me) and reminsce the days of old when we were still silly rebellious teens with Ella, Mervi and Fanny and from there to Cosmic Comic Café where we played a funny character analysis game. Apparently I'd be a great tv-safari hostess whose cameramen get eaten by alligators all the time. :D
Meh. I should probably go to sleep.
I already have like three books I'm currently reading, but I have a feeling I just might grab my The Order of the Phoenix from the shelf and re-read it and The Half-Blood Prince before I go buy the last one.
EDIT: Oh fucking hell. That thing really does bother me. *bangs her head against the desk*
I guess I should at least try to do something about it.
Oh well, shit happens. It does bother me but I guess there's nothing I can do about it.
Ah well, anyways...
I had a nice day. We went to see the fifth Harry Potter movie and I have to say it became my favourite one after The Prisoner of Azkaban, it had a very similar feel to it.
It followed the book very loyally, had some great scenes, great continuity from the previous films (same sets, props and even clothes and flashbacks from the previous films) and über-cute Tonks and Luna.
But there wasn't enough of the Order! The Order of the Phoenix is probably the coolest thing in the whole Potter universe, they deserve more screen time. Especially Remus, who was on the screen like two minutes if even that much (but ha! I always knew young Remus had long hair :]) and wasn't even in the Advance Guard which is weird because the whole point was that he was the only one there whom Harry knew for sure he could trust. And the "Don't call me Nymphadora!" line was supposed to be bantery and the first hint about what happens in the next book. (Yeah, I ship Remus/Tonks, sue me :p)
Also the finale was a bit anticlimatic somehow and Voldy looked too human, must have been the eyes (and it certainly didn't help to see him in a suit or dressed like Harry).
Bellatrix was okay, though half of the time I couldn't help thinking that Helena Bonham Carter was just being herself. ;p But Rodolphus and Rabastan looked great!
Oh, and the "new" Dumbledore still doesn't convince me. He's too shabby and impatient and where the hell are his half-moon glasses? RIP Richard Harris. *sigh*
After the movie we went to eat some Chinese (which I decided is not really for me) and reminsce the days of old when we were still silly rebellious teens with Ella, Mervi and Fanny and from there to Cosmic Comic Café where we played a funny character analysis game. Apparently I'd be a great tv-safari hostess whose cameramen get eaten by alligators all the time. :D
Meh. I should probably go to sleep.
I already have like three books I'm currently reading, but I have a feeling I just might grab my The Order of the Phoenix from the shelf and re-read it and The Half-Blood Prince before I go buy the last one.
EDIT: Oh fucking hell. That thing really does bother me. *bangs her head against the desk*
I guess I should at least try to do something about it.
I feel... strange. I waited for months and months and now I finally know.
"Hope for the best, expect the worst." That's what they say and maybe I should have done so.
Concerning AWE I kinda did expect the worst in the end, though.
But I still was disappointed when it basically fell flat on its ass because I know it could have soared if it had been done right. It could have become the stuff of legends like the LotR trilogy, but at some point of the production something simply went wrong I guess. Hard to say who or what is to blame.
It's definetely worth seeing, if only for Barbossa, Teague, the music and Johnny/Jack. But truth to be told, it mostly failed to deliver. It's a confusing mess that doesn't seem to be sure whether it wants to be avant-garde camp, serious historical drama, epic supernatural adventure or simply a Bruckheimer blockbuster produced by Disney. Or all of them at the same time.
I really really hate to say this, but in a way I feel the same about the new Nightwish.
I love Anette, I do. When it comes to personality and attitude, she's perfect. But while I know I can't say much based only on one full song and a couple of clips... I expected something more. For some reason I kept hearing a voice like Stine Mari Langstrand's (of Lumsk fame) in my head when I thought of the new singer. Meh.
The music is larger than life, of course. Those guys are brilliant musicians, Tuomas is a genius and they have the bloody London Philharmonic to back them up. But... Yeah.
They still have my full support, have no doubt, and I'm definetely not gonna join those "I want Tarja back, waah!!!!11eleventyone11!" wankers. I just expected to fall in love with her vocals in an instant, which I shouldn't have. And I know I'll get over this initial uncertainty soon enough.
(And yes, oh yes, the name of this song makes me laugh. Even though I'm pretty sure it's an allegory to the tabloid media. Which is kinda funny in itself.)
"Hope for the best, expect the worst." That's what they say and maybe I should have done so.
Concerning AWE I kinda did expect the worst in the end, though.
But I still was disappointed when it basically fell flat on its ass because I know it could have soared if it had been done right. It could have become the stuff of legends like the LotR trilogy, but at some point of the production something simply went wrong I guess. Hard to say who or what is to blame.
It's definetely worth seeing, if only for Barbossa, Teague, the music and Johnny/Jack. But truth to be told, it mostly failed to deliver. It's a confusing mess that doesn't seem to be sure whether it wants to be avant-garde camp, serious historical drama, epic supernatural adventure or simply a Bruckheimer blockbuster produced by Disney. Or all of them at the same time.
I really really hate to say this, but in a way I feel the same about the new Nightwish.
I love Anette, I do. When it comes to personality and attitude, she's perfect. But while I know I can't say much based only on one full song and a couple of clips... I expected something more. For some reason I kept hearing a voice like Stine Mari Langstrand's (of Lumsk fame) in my head when I thought of the new singer. Meh.
The music is larger than life, of course. Those guys are brilliant musicians, Tuomas is a genius and they have the bloody London Philharmonic to back them up. But... Yeah.
They still have my full support, have no doubt, and I'm definetely not gonna join those "I want Tarja back, waah!!!!11eleventyone11!" wankers. I just expected to fall in love with her vocals in an instant, which I shouldn't have. And I know I'll get over this initial uncertainty soon enough.
(And yes, oh yes, the name of this song makes me laugh. Even though I'm pretty sure it's an allegory to the tabloid media. Which is kinda funny in itself.)
Tomorrow I should be at Fendari at 10 am to discuss if I should return there.
I feel like running again. Or hiding, "disappearing from the map" as they say.
I know I shouldn't, but the idea is tempting.
Go away. Leave me alone. Forget about me, leave me be. I will only disappoint you.
I was at Jupe's tonight. First that something inside my head, the cowardly/whatever part, tried to tell me not to go, but I decided to go anyway. I'm glad I did.
We talked, listened to some Led Zeppelin and Rush and watched The Dead Poets' Society.
The movie and our conversation made me thoughtful again.
Do I have passion in me? And if I do, what is the object of my passion?
What am I waiting for? What do I really want? Am I just a silly delusional girl who is waiting for that prince on a white horse who in reality will never come and sweep me off my feet and take me to a better place? Does that "perfect love" even exist? A soulmate, a friend and a lover with whom I could be content and free, perhaps even truly happy?
Of course it wouldn't be perfect. It never is.
What did the fortune teller say about that presumed "love of my life" again? That it would not be easy, but that love would prevail. (But I really won't forgive him if he never takes me along to his journeys, at least to those he'll make on his free time. ;p)
And what about that child? How would he affect our relationship?
Ah well, I'd better forget about that prediction. Maybe it will never come true anyway. Maybe that "Wolf-brother" I've "known" I'd find one day ever since I was eleven doesn't even exist.
But I know I'm stubborn enough to not settle for anything less.
But after all... Does it have to be love that makes my life worthwhile and fulfilling?
Is it necessarily love that I'm looking for? No, perhaps not. I guess what I want most is to find a purpose to my life. Why am I here? What should I do with my life? What am I waiting for?
Big questions I probably shouldn't be thinking about. But it's just me, I always think too much.
And I always need to know why?
"Time will tell..."
I damn well hope it will.
I feel like running again. Or hiding, "disappearing from the map" as they say.
I know I shouldn't, but the idea is tempting.
Go away. Leave me alone. Forget about me, leave me be. I will only disappoint you.
I was at Jupe's tonight. First that something inside my head, the cowardly/whatever part, tried to tell me not to go, but I decided to go anyway. I'm glad I did.
We talked, listened to some Led Zeppelin and Rush and watched The Dead Poets' Society.
The movie and our conversation made me thoughtful again.
Do I have passion in me? And if I do, what is the object of my passion?
What am I waiting for? What do I really want? Am I just a silly delusional girl who is waiting for that prince on a white horse who in reality will never come and sweep me off my feet and take me to a better place? Does that "perfect love" even exist? A soulmate, a friend and a lover with whom I could be content and free, perhaps even truly happy?
Of course it wouldn't be perfect. It never is.
What did the fortune teller say about that presumed "love of my life" again? That it would not be easy, but that love would prevail. (But I really won't forgive him if he never takes me along to his journeys, at least to those he'll make on his free time. ;p)
And what about that child? How would he affect our relationship?
Ah well, I'd better forget about that prediction. Maybe it will never come true anyway. Maybe that "Wolf-brother" I've "known" I'd find one day ever since I was eleven doesn't even exist.
But I know I'm stubborn enough to not settle for anything less.
But after all... Does it have to be love that makes my life worthwhile and fulfilling?
Is it necessarily love that I'm looking for? No, perhaps not. I guess what I want most is to find a purpose to my life. Why am I here? What should I do with my life? What am I waiting for?
Big questions I probably shouldn't be thinking about. But it's just me, I always think too much.
And I always need to know why?
"Time will tell..."
I damn well hope it will.
Gah, first they changed the layout of the Nightwish Website and it was okay, I guess, but now they changed the layout of the forum too and it feels really weird.
It used to be so beautiful and soothing with that deep midnight blue and twinkling stars and now it's so... grey. Dull. Sterile. =/
Oh well, I guess I'll get used to it, but I do hope they will change it again soon, to match the colour theme of the forthcoming album or something (since this layout is supposed to match the Once colours... But where is the purple?).
I want my interactive home to feel like home again.
Anyways... I just came home about 1,5 hours ago from celebrating Ville's 18th birthday.
It was quite a nice evening after all. I almost beat Tommi in Tekken even though I've never played it before, bonded a bit with a fellow empath, probably drank more alcohol than ever before (augh, my head...), heard something really confusing, laughed my ass off at the antics of the very drunken Tommi and Ville ("Duffman!!! "Oh yeah!!") and even felt loved. Nice.
Nevertheless I decided it was better to come home instead of going to Mervi's with the others even though for some reason the boys really seemed to want me to come along. :p
It was better this way.
Hmm... Yesterday there was a TV-movie by BBC on TV, about what would happen if the enormous volcano under the Yellowstone National Park in USA would erupt. Quite interesting, in a macabre way though. Reminded me of the dream I had a couple of nights ago.
In that dream I was inside a some kind of vault, underground or under some mountains, I'm not exactly sure. Either way the point was that there was going to be a huge deluge that would drown everything under it, a bit like in the movie Deep Impact.
I remember the moment when the water started flooding above our heads. And just like the man with that Irish accent in the tv-movie I said: "So now it begins..." with a tone that was almost delighted in some twisted, macabre way. And quite sadly I thought about everything the water would drown under it, all the buildings and cities, forests and hills...
Interesting, really...
Hmm, I wonder if I'm going through my first hangover ever right now. :p
And I'm quite sure there was also something else I wanted to write about but I can't remember what it was. Damn.
It used to be so beautiful and soothing with that deep midnight blue and twinkling stars and now it's so... grey. Dull. Sterile. =/
Oh well, I guess I'll get used to it, but I do hope they will change it again soon, to match the colour theme of the forthcoming album or something (since this layout is supposed to match the Once colours... But where is the purple?).
I want my interactive home to feel like home again.
Anyways... I just came home about 1,5 hours ago from celebrating Ville's 18th birthday.
It was quite a nice evening after all. I almost beat Tommi in Tekken even though I've never played it before, bonded a bit with a fellow empath, probably drank more alcohol than ever before (augh, my head...), heard something really confusing, laughed my ass off at the antics of the very drunken Tommi and Ville ("Duffman!!! "Oh yeah!!") and even felt loved. Nice.
Nevertheless I decided it was better to come home instead of going to Mervi's with the others even though for some reason the boys really seemed to want me to come along. :p
It was better this way.
Hmm... Yesterday there was a TV-movie by BBC on TV, about what would happen if the enormous volcano under the Yellowstone National Park in USA would erupt. Quite interesting, in a macabre way though. Reminded me of the dream I had a couple of nights ago.
In that dream I was inside a some kind of vault, underground or under some mountains, I'm not exactly sure. Either way the point was that there was going to be a huge deluge that would drown everything under it, a bit like in the movie Deep Impact.
I remember the moment when the water started flooding above our heads. And just like the man with that Irish accent in the tv-movie I said: "So now it begins..." with a tone that was almost delighted in some twisted, macabre way. And quite sadly I thought about everything the water would drown under it, all the buildings and cities, forests and hills...
Interesting, really...
Hmm, I wonder if I'm going through my first hangover ever right now. :p
And I'm quite sure there was also something else I wanted to write about but I can't remember what it was. Damn.
Meh... For once I'm online this time of the night. And I'm damn tired, although I probably wouldn't get sleep very soon because I just drank two cups of tea to shrug off my zombie-like condition. *sigh*
We went to see FC Venus today with the SITKU team, and it was actually better than I expected. Most of the actors were actually quite natural and credible in their roles, and I even managed to think of them as the characters, not as themselves.
So the amateur actors in Siamin Tytöt (All hail Jaska! x]) in fact aren't the only ones in Finland who can act naturally and believably, I see... But I still don't like Finnish movies in general. Though I might want to check out that Unna ja Nuuk.
And that forthcoming movie about the girl who feels connected with wolves, Suden Arvoitus I think its name was...
Ah, anyway... I really hope that now that I quit the school I will get the unemployment benefit as well as the 8€ per day from going to SITKU every day. Damn bureaucracy, really makes me want to retreat somewhere in the middle of the vast wilderness and just mind my own business with only the laws of the nature to obey. Stupid humans just make everything so unnecessarily complicated...
Gah. Silly quizzes again:
*dies of laughter*
( More )
Gah. I should go to sleep, Ella-darling's gonna drop by tomorrow at 1 pm.
We went to see FC Venus today with the SITKU team, and it was actually better than I expected. Most of the actors were actually quite natural and credible in their roles, and I even managed to think of them as the characters, not as themselves.
So the amateur actors in Siamin Tytöt (All hail Jaska! x]) in fact aren't the only ones in Finland who can act naturally and believably, I see... But I still don't like Finnish movies in general. Though I might want to check out that Unna ja Nuuk.
And that forthcoming movie about the girl who feels connected with wolves, Suden Arvoitus I think its name was...
Ah, anyway... I really hope that now that I quit the school I will get the unemployment benefit as well as the 8€ per day from going to SITKU every day. Damn bureaucracy, really makes me want to retreat somewhere in the middle of the vast wilderness and just mind my own business with only the laws of the nature to obey. Stupid humans just make everything so unnecessarily complicated...
Gah. Silly quizzes again:
Your Stipper Song Is |
![]() She Wants to Move by N.E.R.D. "Her off beat dance makes me fantasize (Her curves) She's sexy!!" You are 100% sex appeal. As simple as that. |
*dies of laughter*
( More )
Gah. I should go to sleep, Ella-darling's gonna drop by tomorrow at 1 pm.
*sigh* I still didn't manage to do anything really relevant today...
Oh well.
But I spent some quality time with Ella, Ville and Fanny today, it was nice. We watched Studio Impossible and Terminator II and talked about politics a bit. Politics, isn't it strange? *chuckles*
And tomorrow we'll possibly go to Whisky Bar to celebrate the first off-weekend of our heroes in the military forces and after that to Sokeri (yes, Sokeri, aren't we wicked? :p) to dance.
I bought From Wishes To Eternity from the sale in Anttila, by the way. Now I'm only lacking the forthcoming End of an Era...
I also found the Once notebook and got ridiculously happy about it and browsed it through in almost ecstasy. And Ville was having fun watching me whimper excitedly. :P
I mean, what the hell would I do with that? I can't sing or play any instruments.
But I guess it were those commentaries written by Tuomas about each song. Sounds probably really weird and fangirly and everything, but reading them just managed to make me really happy for a while.
I just like his wholehearted sincerity and his quiet, intelligent sense of humor so much. ^^
Gah, I'd better go to sleep now, it's 6.14 am...
Maybe I'll read a couple of chapters of Jane Eyre before that.
Or listen to Visor Om Slutet...
Oh well.
But I spent some quality time with Ella, Ville and Fanny today, it was nice. We watched Studio Impossible and Terminator II and talked about politics a bit. Politics, isn't it strange? *chuckles*
And tomorrow we'll possibly go to Whisky Bar to celebrate the first off-weekend of our heroes in the military forces and after that to Sokeri (yes, Sokeri, aren't we wicked? :p) to dance.
I bought From Wishes To Eternity from the sale in Anttila, by the way. Now I'm only lacking the forthcoming End of an Era...
I also found the Once notebook and got ridiculously happy about it and browsed it through in almost ecstasy. And Ville was having fun watching me whimper excitedly. :P
I mean, what the hell would I do with that? I can't sing or play any instruments.
But I guess it were those commentaries written by Tuomas about each song. Sounds probably really weird and fangirly and everything, but reading them just managed to make me really happy for a while.
I just like his wholehearted sincerity and his quiet, intelligent sense of humor so much. ^^
Gah, I'd better go to sleep now, it's 6.14 am...
Maybe I'll read a couple of chapters of Jane Eyre before that.
Or listen to Visor Om Slutet...
Hum. Työt alkoivat ihan hyvin mitä nyt on tavallaan vähän sellainen olo kun olisi palannut yläasteen käsityöntunneille (*brr!*)kun joukko mimmejä höpöttää kaikenlaista naismaista, Jutta etunenässä. *hymähtää*
Tänään meinasin pyörtyä pari kertaa töissä kun olen tämän flunssan ja vaikka minkä vuoksi vähän huonossa hapessa mutta kestin kuitenkin koko päivän kun se kuitenkin on vain se neljä tuntia miinus puolen tunnin ruokatauko jolloin voi käväistä kotona.
Ja opinpa jotain uutta, nimittäin rakentelemaan lahjapakkauksia ja käyttämään liimapyssyä. Yay.
Harmi vain ettei Veeraa näkynyt, oli pikkuisen ulkopuolinen olo vaikka Jutta nyt on tuttu entuudestaan ja muutkin ovat ihan kivoja.
Unirytmini kyllä on ihan sekaisin taas.
Tiistaina ehdin nukkua neljä tuntia kun piti olla yhdeltä kaupungilla kun menimme Ellan ja Tommin kanssa Liekehtivää Pikaria katsomaan (siitä lisää mahdollisesti myöhemmin) ja sen ja tämän flunssan seurauksena uuvuinkin sitten jo kymmenen jälkeen illalla ja heräsinkin sitten jo ennen kuutta. No, ehdinpähän ainakin mainiosti töihin ekana päivänä.
Eilen meni vähän myöhempään, menin nukkumaan yhden maissa ja heräsin taas kohtalaisen ajoissa. Mutta vaikka nukuinkin kaiketi ihan riittävästi olin tosiaan sen verran kuollut että tuli tuossa päivällä kuukahdettua sohvalle pariksi tunniksi.
Ja siitä päästäänkin siihen miksi olen yhä valveilla. *huokaus*
Toivottavasti olen huomenna jo siinä kunnossa että voin lähteä kaupungillekin, kun pitää mennä isää tapaamaan, hakemaan saapas suuutarista ja käydä vähän katselemassa josko peräti löytäisin jotain kivaa ja lähestulkoon olemattomalle budjetilleni sopivaa joululahjaideaa noille rakkaille otuksilleni.
Olen muuten löytänyt Finntrollin ihan toden teolla. Mieletöntä musiikkia.
Pitää hankkia ainakin Visor Om Slutet heti kun saan ekan "palkkani". Siinäpä peikkotunnelmaa aidoimmillaan mikäli minä mistään mitään olen ymmärtänyt. R.I.P Somnium. *kumoaa kuvitteellisen sahtituopin tuon liian varhain Valhallaan (tai jonnekin) lähteneen peikkoveikkosen muistoksi*
Ja voi luoja joku on nero, oli se sitten Tuomas Holopainen, Pip Williams tai molemmat...
Tämä Creek Mary's Bloodin orkestraaliversio on vain jotain niin käsittämättömän täydellistä. *kylmiä väreitä*
Mutta joo, voisi yrittää tämän jälkeen mennä saamaan unta.
Tänään meinasin pyörtyä pari kertaa töissä kun olen tämän flunssan ja vaikka minkä vuoksi vähän huonossa hapessa mutta kestin kuitenkin koko päivän kun se kuitenkin on vain se neljä tuntia miinus puolen tunnin ruokatauko jolloin voi käväistä kotona.
Ja opinpa jotain uutta, nimittäin rakentelemaan lahjapakkauksia ja käyttämään liimapyssyä. Yay.
Harmi vain ettei Veeraa näkynyt, oli pikkuisen ulkopuolinen olo vaikka Jutta nyt on tuttu entuudestaan ja muutkin ovat ihan kivoja.
Unirytmini kyllä on ihan sekaisin taas.
Tiistaina ehdin nukkua neljä tuntia kun piti olla yhdeltä kaupungilla kun menimme Ellan ja Tommin kanssa Liekehtivää Pikaria katsomaan (siitä lisää mahdollisesti myöhemmin) ja sen ja tämän flunssan seurauksena uuvuinkin sitten jo kymmenen jälkeen illalla ja heräsinkin sitten jo ennen kuutta. No, ehdinpähän ainakin mainiosti töihin ekana päivänä.
Eilen meni vähän myöhempään, menin nukkumaan yhden maissa ja heräsin taas kohtalaisen ajoissa. Mutta vaikka nukuinkin kaiketi ihan riittävästi olin tosiaan sen verran kuollut että tuli tuossa päivällä kuukahdettua sohvalle pariksi tunniksi.
Ja siitä päästäänkin siihen miksi olen yhä valveilla. *huokaus*
Toivottavasti olen huomenna jo siinä kunnossa että voin lähteä kaupungillekin, kun pitää mennä isää tapaamaan, hakemaan saapas suuutarista ja käydä vähän katselemassa josko peräti löytäisin jotain kivaa ja lähestulkoon olemattomalle budjetilleni sopivaa joululahjaideaa noille rakkaille otuksilleni.
Olen muuten löytänyt Finntrollin ihan toden teolla. Mieletöntä musiikkia.
Pitää hankkia ainakin Visor Om Slutet heti kun saan ekan "palkkani". Siinäpä peikkotunnelmaa aidoimmillaan mikäli minä mistään mitään olen ymmärtänyt. R.I.P Somnium. *kumoaa kuvitteellisen sahtituopin tuon liian varhain Valhallaan (tai jonnekin) lähteneen peikkoveikkosen muistoksi*
Ja voi luoja joku on nero, oli se sitten Tuomas Holopainen, Pip Williams tai molemmat...
Tämä Creek Mary's Bloodin orkestraaliversio on vain jotain niin käsittämättömän täydellistä. *kylmiä väreitä*
Mutta joo, voisi yrittää tämän jälkeen mennä saamaan unta.
*blinkblink*
10 October 2005 01:24Oi, löysin juuri uusimman trailerin Goblet of Fireen...
Jesus God, en malta odottaa!
(Jauhanko nykyään mistään muusta kuin uudesta Potter-leffasta? O_o)
Pettymys tänään oli se, että toinen niistä mahtavista "Fred&George" -kaksosista pudotettiin Idolsista.
Ihan epäreilua, olisin halunnut molemmat finaaliin.
Hitto, minun on monena iltana/yönä pitänyt päivittää, mutta sitten se on aina vain jäänyt.
Ja Lauralle on pitänyt mailata jo pari viikkoa, mutta kun ei saa mitään aikaiseksi. Äh.
Huomenna pääsee taas ihmisten ilmoille kun pelataan Stormbringeriä, ja torstaina alkaakin jo koulu niin on pakko ryhdistäytyä.
*hieroo silmiään* Perkeleen näyttö.
Ja pitäisi varmaan hankkia elämä. Tai jotain.
Tai mennä suosiolla nukkumaan...
Niin, ja sitten tämä, sillä lupaukset pidetään...
1. Vastaa nimelläsi ja minä kerron sinusta jotain.
2. Kerron sinulle, mikä bändi / elokuva muistuttaa minua sinusta.
3. Keksin jotain yhteistä/samaa intressiä mitä meillä on.
4. Kerron mistä saattaisin kadehtia sinua.
5. Kerron ensimmäisen muistoni sinusta.
6. Kerron sinulle eläimen, josta tulet mieleeni.
7. Kysyn sinulta jotain, mitä olen halunnut kysyä.
8. Jos teen tämän sinusta, sinun täytyy laittaa tämä journaliisi.
Jesus God, en malta odottaa!
(Jauhanko nykyään mistään muusta kuin uudesta Potter-leffasta? O_o)
Pettymys tänään oli se, että toinen niistä mahtavista "Fred&George" -kaksosista pudotettiin Idolsista.
Ihan epäreilua, olisin halunnut molemmat finaaliin.
Hitto, minun on monena iltana/yönä pitänyt päivittää, mutta sitten se on aina vain jäänyt.
Ja Lauralle on pitänyt mailata jo pari viikkoa, mutta kun ei saa mitään aikaiseksi. Äh.
Huomenna pääsee taas ihmisten ilmoille kun pelataan Stormbringeriä, ja torstaina alkaakin jo koulu niin on pakko ryhdistäytyä.
*hieroo silmiään* Perkeleen näyttö.
Ja pitäisi varmaan hankkia elämä. Tai jotain.
Tai mennä suosiolla nukkumaan...
Niin, ja sitten tämä, sillä lupaukset pidetään...
1. Vastaa nimelläsi ja minä kerron sinusta jotain.
2. Kerron sinulle, mikä bändi / elokuva muistuttaa minua sinusta.
3. Keksin jotain yhteistä/samaa intressiä mitä meillä on.
4. Kerron mistä saattaisin kadehtia sinua.
5. Kerron ensimmäisen muistoni sinusta.
6. Kerron sinulle eläimen, josta tulet mieleeni.
7. Kysyn sinulta jotain, mitä olen halunnut kysyä.
8. Jos teen tämän sinusta, sinun täytyy laittaa tämä journaliisi.
Näin tänään ihmisiä ensimäistä kertaa varmaan viikkoon.
Kämppä oli tyhjä kun veli on isän luona ja äiti yövuorossa, siispä ajattelin, että tänne voisi tulla joku.
Ja tulikin sitten, Samppa ja Ella ilmaantuivat tänne Panimolla pelatun Kääpiölarpin jälkeen ja jäivät hengailemaan muutamaksi tunniksi.
Humalainen kaksikko Ville ja Mäksy löysivät myös tiensä tänne jossakin vaiheessa ja sitten katsottiin Azkabanin Vanki.
Loppujen lopuksi se meni siihen, että katsoin sitä kahdestaan Samuelin kanssa kun Ella nukkui sohvalla ja kännikaksikko oli lähtenyt kotiin Lietoon.
Mutta mukavaa oli silti.
Ja ei sitä kovin usein saa todistaa komeaa miestä makaamassa olohuoneensa lattialla puhumassa venäjää. :D
Siskoa vaivasi jokin. Voi kyllä olla, että tiedän mikä.
Toivon vain, että hän saa sen pian selvitettyä.
Mm, pitäisi varmaan mennä nukkumaan jos ajattelin herätä ajoissa sinne TEI:n älämölömusisointiryhmän ekaan kokoontumiseen. Jos kolmeksi itsensä saisi ylös.
Sitä ennen vielä vähän
caladan_dd:n upeiden kuvien kuolausta.
Hitto, haluan oikeasti HBP:n käsiini jotta voin Potteroitua taas kunnolla.
Taidan muuten olla paranemaan päin. Yay.
Kämppä oli tyhjä kun veli on isän luona ja äiti yövuorossa, siispä ajattelin, että tänne voisi tulla joku.
Ja tulikin sitten, Samppa ja Ella ilmaantuivat tänne Panimolla pelatun Kääpiölarpin jälkeen ja jäivät hengailemaan muutamaksi tunniksi.
Humalainen kaksikko Ville ja Mäksy löysivät myös tiensä tänne jossakin vaiheessa ja sitten katsottiin Azkabanin Vanki.
Loppujen lopuksi se meni siihen, että katsoin sitä kahdestaan Samuelin kanssa kun Ella nukkui sohvalla ja kännikaksikko oli lähtenyt kotiin Lietoon.
Mutta mukavaa oli silti.
Ja ei sitä kovin usein saa todistaa komeaa miestä makaamassa olohuoneensa lattialla puhumassa venäjää. :D
Siskoa vaivasi jokin. Voi kyllä olla, että tiedän mikä.
Toivon vain, että hän saa sen pian selvitettyä.
Mm, pitäisi varmaan mennä nukkumaan jos ajattelin herätä ajoissa sinne TEI:n älämölömusisointiryhmän ekaan kokoontumiseen. Jos kolmeksi itsensä saisi ylös.
Sitä ennen vielä vähän
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
Hitto, haluan oikeasti HBP:n käsiini jotta voin Potteroitua taas kunnolla.
Taidan muuten olla paranemaan päin. Yay.