...

[darnaguen]

I have an unexplainable and quite frightening urge to get drunk, totally shit-faced drunk.
Not that I could, at the moment. Two puny cans of Rekorderlig and a small bottle of Vana Tallinn that currently reside in my fridge are hardly enough to get me anything more than mildly sloshed. So why bother.

I've also recently come to a conclusion that I'm even more fucked-up than I've given myself credit for. I'm only surprised of how long it took me to realize it. *chuckle*
Asocial. Avoidant. Obsessive-Compulsive. (Passively) self-destructive. And who knows what else.
So maybe that psychiatric evaluation and personal therapist assigned to me weren't such bad ideas after all.

Meh.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Vähän melkein kuin minä tänä vuonna. Ehkä sitä on ilmassa? *karin

[darnaguen.livejournal.com]

Oi voi, tämä kyllä taitaa tosiaan olla kirottu vuosi tai jotain.
Tosin, omalla kohdallani tätä on jatkunut koko ikäni, joten voi olla, että minussa on vain valmistusvirhe tai jotain. :p

[(Anonymous)]

Joo, en vielä kauheasti ole lämmennyt vuodelle 2008, vaikka monen mielestä syytäkin olisi, mutta en itse tunne niin. Pikemmin tekee mieli vain koko ajan juosta pois ja kovaa, niin ehkä tämä kipu ja ahdistus lakkaisi, ja kun oikein väsyttäisi itsensä niin ehkä ei sitten jaksaisi enää ajatella tai tuntea.

Ja joskus olen epäillyt itsekin olevani joku maanantaimalli. :D

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, it is baffling that no matter what introspective deep thinker you consider yourself, for quite a while, you still somehow subconsciously manage to escape from acknowledging the state you're really in. It has happened to me too. But I guess it is important to face the real crude state of affairs to start some sort of recovery. Well, at least I hope so.

And funny you should mention Garbage, I recently rediscovered them after almost ten years. They were one of the first bands that really fell in love with, but it is a bit disturbing that Version 2.0 still seems to tell the story of my life, just like when I was 14. Aarg.

"When I grow up
I'll be stable
When I grow up
I'll turn the tables"

Yep, still waiting for that to happen.:)

-Maarit